Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize