she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
