if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
