break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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