life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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