I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize