I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
