brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
