Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
