i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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