break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize