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Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
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