yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
