they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
