Do you still have your period?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
And then the night went full on bisexual.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
