Already got asked if we're dating
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
