The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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