apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I'm way too hungover for life right now
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