I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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