We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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