Well douche your snatch and let's go!
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
