We're facebook friends in real life
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Randomize
