dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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