i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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