I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Randomize