He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize