How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
only you would photoshop your dick
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
