you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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