when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
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