She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize