i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
