I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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