Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
