Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
