She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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