Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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