How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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