I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Dicks are not precious.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize