normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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