I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Randomize
