perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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