My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
