We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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