That's intense
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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