there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
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