You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
