I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Randomize
