I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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