Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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