so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Randomize
